Episode 18: What I Wanted to Say

「Well, Senpa…」

「Takanashi-san.」

Senpai spoke right over my words.

She had a dead serious expression on her face… even though she was still clutching my hem.

Which meant, well, we were pretty close.

「I’m sorry. There are a lot of things to talk about, including what happened today, and I’m sure there’s stuff you want to say too. But please, let me go first.」

「Understood. But let me confirm just this one thing.」

She looked calm on the surface, but Senpai is good at hiding things.

I wondered if she was really okay…

「Senpai, are you actually okay?」

「……Yes.」

「It’s right after everything that happened. You don’t have to tough it out, just be honest with me.」

「……」

I waited for her response.

「…Well, just a little… when I remember it.」

Her hands looked like they were starting to shake again.

Based on past experience, the only thing I could think of to fix this was a total shock to the system to overwrite the trauma.

I’d never even gone this far with Yuzuha, but…

「Senpai, I’m apologizing in advance. Sorry.」

I steeled my resolve and gave her a light hug, something I couldn’t pull off back on the rooftop.

「Eh!?」

It was clearly unexpected, and Senpai let out a surprised yelp.

I didn’t let that stop me and kept going.

「Senpai, like I said before, those guys won’t be a problem anymore. And the President made sure to deal with their group too. Plus, your friends are here.」

I kept talking, trying to drive the point home.

「And… I won’t misunderstand you anymore. That thing you said before was just you acting as the Vice President, right?」

「…Yes. I was actually planning to explain that now.」

「Then I won’t get the wrong idea again. If you don’t mind me being around, then I’ll keep helping out from now on.」

「…Thank you… Sorry, just let me stay like this for a little bit.」

She didn’t seem to be crying, but Senpai leaned on me a bit.

I stayed like that for a while until her shaking stopped.

I pulled away once she seemed to settle down, but honestly, I was at my limit too.

I was freaking out inside…

「I’m sorry. I’m okay now. If I’m feeling something, I’ll make sure to tell you properly from now on.」

It looks like she’s finally calm.

「I intended to explain everything, but it seems you’ve already understood the most important part that I needed to say. Even so, I still want to tell you clearly. Will you listen?」

「Yes.」

「To say it again… I believe in you.」

「I think you are different from other men. Please forget what I said the other day about not showing favoritism. That was just my role as the Student Council Vice President speaking.」

「…Yes.」

Honestly, I was happy, but since it turned out to be just like I’d suspected, a dumb misunderstanding on my part, I felt a wave of guilt.

「Do you understand now… that I, personally, see you that way?」

Senpai asked with a hint of anxiety in her voice.

「…Yes, thank you. Honestly, I’m happy you said that. I’ve got plenty of things I need to tell you too, but can I ask one thing?」

「Yes.」

Right… it’s something that’s been on my mind for a while, and now that I know for sure she trusts me, it’s bothering me even more.

「Senpai, you knew about me, didn’t you? You said you saw me watering the flowers, but you treated me normally right from the start. I’d never met you before, so just because of the watering…」

「Oh, so that’s what it was.」

Senpai looked away for a second, as if she was remembering something.