Episode 339: The Winner Is…

「Wait, wait a second!! Why is the name of someone who didn’t even enter… I mean, this is a Miss Contest, right!!?? Why is Takanashi-kun’s name on here!!??」

Minamin was in a total state of panic over this unprecedented, ridiculous situation.

Even for me, this was completely outside my predictions, and I have no idea what to say. Someone please explain this to me!!

「Um…」

「C-Could it be… Takanashi-kun was actually… a girl!!??」

「「What did you sayyyyy!!」」

At Tachikawa-san’s shocking suggestion, everyone including me had the exact same reaction.

I haven’t even the slightest idea why she would think that, so I was naturally shocked… wait, that is not it!!

「How did you even reach that conclusion!?」

「Ahaha… sorry, it just slipped out.」

「I wouldn’t mind at all if Kazunari were a cross-dresser. It wouldn’t change the way I dote on him.」

「Wait!?」

「Um, Hanako-san? Takanashi-kun has been a boy from the start, you know?」

「That’s not it. A cross-dresser is…」

「Hanako-san, stop, no more of that.」

Even if it is Hanako-san, I can’t overlook her trying to teach such weird things to the pure angel that is Todo-san. That is something that should never be allowed, even God says so.

「Marina-san, Kazunari is a genuine man.」

「Y-Yeah, that’s right, he’s a boy, right?」

While tilting her head at the subtle weirdness of the conversation, Todo-san seemed to accept it for now.

Honestly… Hanako-san is such a handful… wait, what are we even talking about?

「Um… Fukazawa-sa…」

「Minamin!!」

「Minamin-san, is that result for real?」

「…What is the deal, Prep Committee!?」

Minamin looked up at the sky and started shouting toward nowhere to ask about Sara-san’s doubt. I wonder if there will be a response to that voice… As I watched for a while, the screen display suddenly switched.

《It is a fact, so we are also confused. We assume it is mostly the female vote.》

That explanation appeared on the screen.

The female vote?

「I see, so that’s it…」

「Oh boy, Takanashi-kun’s stock has really gone up.」

「But Takanashi-kun worked really hard today…」

Meaning… the events of today earned me some kind of evaluation from the women in the crowd, and that led to this result?

In any case, it is honestly a happy thing to be thought of well… but that seems completely unrelated to me becoming the runner-up of a Miss Contest?

「Nice!!! A total success!!!」

「Nyahaha, this might have turned into something interesting.」

「You did it, Takanashi-kun!!」

「Congrats on being the runner-up!!」

「Takanashi-kun, if you like, come to our classroom next time…」

「…Mana, you…」

「…S-Shut up, I didn’t mean it like that!」

「…Well, well, after seeing that, people with those traits would naturally… right?」

「…You too!?」

Judging by the reactions of everyone around us, it seems there was a mysterious organized vote by the girls.

For the record… I have no intention of barging into a classroom of third-year students I don’t know for no reason, so don’t get your hopes up.

「Mmm… what are we gonna do about this, Prep Committee!?」

《Put it on hold for now and move the story along.》

「On hold, what about the Chairman!?」

《He is in a daze from the shock of all these unexpected events.》

「This is hopeless… got it.」

Apparently, a conclusion was reached… or rather, it was just pushed back, but is that really okay?

Not only is an unentered person the runner-up, but I am a「man」in the first place!?

「…So that is how it is. Is that okay with you too, Satsukawa-san?」

「Whether it is okay or not, if the Prep Committee has decided, I have no choice but to follow, right?」

「W-Well, that’s true… wait, um, Sara-san?」

「…What is it?」

「I mean… are you angry about something… oh, could it be.」

「…I’m not particularly angry, you know?」

「Hieeee!! S-Sorry, it’s nothing at all!!」

Minamin seemed to literally shrink under the mysterious pressure Sara-san was emitting.

I noticed Sara-san’s expression was stiff… but maybe she wasn’t angry, so much as pouting…

「Mufufu… Sara is so cute.」

「She’s been showing some composure lately, but Sara was always quite the jealous type. She used to get jealous even of me… Honestly, her character crumbles so easily when it comes to Takanashi-kun.」

「It can’t be helped. Sara is a woman, after all… and besides, thinking about her fiancé being popular with other women would hardly leave her at peace.」

「…Kazunari, what’s wrong? Why the long face?」

「No…」

It’s often said that being the one someone is jealous of is a happy thing, but for the one doing the jealous-ing, it is not fun at all. I have felt that it was not fun in many ways that Sara-san was constantly being approached by other men… so it would be a lie to say that those feelings weren’t part of why I chose to make my proposal「public.」

Even if it’s impossible for our positions to be reversed, considering Sara-san’s feelings… I can’t really feel happy about her being jealous in this situation.

「Fufu… you really are serious, Takanashi-san.」

「That is Kazunari’s good point.」

「Eh… Takanashi-kun hasn’t said anything yet… wait, really?」

「It’s true. Hanako-san and Eririn understand what Takanashi-kun was thinking. Well, I kind of get it too.」

「Hanako-san aside, has Nishikawa-san become a Takanashi-kun master too!?」

「No, I only have a hunch. I am no match for Sara and Hanako-san.」

「This is a passive skill sisters have. It’s nothing to be surprised about.」

「No… that doesn’t happen with normal siblings, okay?」

Forget normal siblings, there aren’t any sisters with a special ability like that… right?

But Sara-san and Hanako-san see right through my thoughts so sharply that it’s scary… I mean, impressive.

「S-So, what about everyone else…」

When Minamin asked the other contestants for confirmation… they all gave wry smiles and everyone except for the stuck-up woman gave a nod.

From a majority vote perspective, it was already settled at this point… but that meant I, a man, was going to be the runner-up on a stage where women compete in a「Miss Contest.」That is just wild.

「Haa… I’ve never heard of a Miss Contest like this. But I guess it will go down in history in a sense… ALRIIIIIIGHT, I’m just gonna go for it!! Let’s just do this!!!」

Clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap!!!!!

At Minamin’s resigned declaration, the audience… especially the noisy girls… gave applause that could be taken as either a welcome or sympathy. This made the conclusion of me being the runner-up feel even more real.

At this point, maybe I should just prepare myself like Minamin did.

「Now, sorry to keep you waiting!!! It is finally time to announce the winner!!! This Miss Contest was a huge scramble of unexpected events… so you never know who’s gonna win until the very end!!?? Now, here we gooooooooo!!!!」

「…Huge scramble or not, the wife’s victory was predestined.」

「…Hanako-san, shhh!!」

「…Minamin is only saying that because she knows it too.」

Dududududududududu…

The usual sound effect to hype the atmosphere flowed from the speakers, and even more spotlights than before darted around the stage.

It was still late afternoon, but the sun sets early this time of year… the lights on stage going out created even more of an atmosphere, and it felt like it was all a setup to make Sara-san stand out…

「The 32nd!!! School Festival Miss Contest!!! The glorious winner isssssssss…」

We shouldn’t be the only ones who had a hunch about the result, yet the audience was watching the stage with bated breath, the atmosphere thick with anticipation for the big moment.

The air in the entire audience was tense as if to symbolize that, and then…

Minamin… threw her body back!!

「Entry No. 9!!! Satsukawa, Saraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!」

Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!

Pop!! Pop!! Pa-pop!!!

The spotlights all focused on Sara-san at once, and the audience was enveloped in massive cheers and thunderous applause. A grand fanfare echoed from the speakers, and with a loud burst, confetti soared into the air on stage… catching the light of the spotlights and falling while sparkling.

And Sara-san…

Even if she thought of this Miss Contest as a farce, perhaps the fact of「winning」meant something to her…

She wore a smile that looked a little bit happy, and a little bit bashful… and she stared straight at only me.

「CONGRATULATIONSSSSSSSSSSS!!!! As expected, Satsukawa-san was strong!!! Even with the boys decreasing this much, winning anyway is just proof of how amazing she is!! Truly incredible!!!」

「…Thank you. To be honest, I didn’t think I would win.」

「Ah, for the record, the judging points were almost equal with Mayumi-san!!! The first and second rounds were especially close!!!!」

「I see. But for me, I’m satisfied just to have beaten Mother in the cooking round.」

「Oh, is that so!? But now that you mention it, she did look uniquely fired up!! Now, normally we would go straight to the winner’s interview… but there is still a problem… wait!?」

When Minamin turned around to check something, the words「Results Announcement」disappeared from the screen at that exact moment… replaced by the bold letters「Winner, Satsukawa Sara.」

And below that, in slightly smaller letters than Sara-san’s name, was the name「Takanashi Kazunari」as the runner-up… hey!!??

「Um… it looks like it’s officially confirmed that Takanashi-kun is the runner-up!!! Well then, Takanashi-kun, please come up to the stage again!!!!!!!!!!」

「WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT!?」

Wait a second, is it really okay for me to be the runner-up!?

No matter how messed up things got, if a man wins a prize in a Miss Contest, doesn’t that undermine the whole point!?

「Takanashi-kuuuuun!! Get up on stage already!!」

「That’s right, your wife is waiting for youuuuu!!!!」

「The husband and wife got the one-two finish!!」

「Be happy together~!!!」

Vague voices, unsure if they were being warm or just teasing, rose from around me, and loud applause could be heard from the back.

They all seemed to be pushing me to get on stage… or maybe just heckling me? I wasn’t sure, but with this atmosphere, it felt like the story wouldn’t move forward unless I went out.

「Mmm, looks like we need one more push!? Mufufuu… come on, Satsukawa-san, call your husband out!!!」

「Eh!? Kazunari-sa…」

「That is not it!! You called him ‘Dear’ earlier, right!!??」

「Um, well… D-Dear, please come here…」

KYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ugh!?

At the sight of Sara-san calling me in a small, embarrassed voice, a massive, high-pitched roar erupted, on par with a concert for a popular male idol group.

「Dear, she said Dear!!??」

「Fooooo, they’re not even lovers anymore!!! They’re a perfect married couple!!!」

「Satsukawa-san is blushing!!!!」

「Kyaaaaaaaa, go explode already!!!!」

「Hubby!! Wifey is calling you!!!」

「I could eat three bowls of rice just watching this!!!!」

「There is such a massive rom-com smell coming from that Satsukawa-san!!!!」

「Kazunari, you should go quickly. The commotion won’t settle down at this rate.」

「Ugh… you’re right.」

「This is the result of what you and Sara pulled, so just prepare yourself and go!!」

「U-Understood!」

I still have doubts about whether this is really okay… but I know one thing for sure, if I don’t go up there, Sara-san will be left feeling embarrassed the whole time.

If that is the case, I have no room for choice or time to think. I’ve already made my proposal and kiss public, I won’t flinch at something like this now!!

「I-I’m going.」

「Good luck!!」

「Do it right!!」

「Fight on!!」

Just like when I barged in for the proposal, I had the support of everyone and then some at my back as I climbed the center stairs.

At the top, Minamin was laughing while looking at me with a smirk, as if she had completely given up or was getting some petty revenge. The other contestants were laughing too. I went straight to Sara-san’s side… a spot toward the center of the stage.

「MAAAAAAAAAAN, welcome, Takanashi-kun!!! First of all, congrats on being the runner-up!!!」

Clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap!!!!

I received a grand round of applause from the entire venue that felt strangely meaningful… How should I even react to this?

It would obviously be weird to be happy, but it didn’t feel right to be angry either.

So, should I laugh?

Should I act sulky?

I don’t really know.

「Um, is this really okay?」

「Whether it’s okay or not is too late to ask. Besides, the contestants and the audience said it was fine, and it looks like the Prep Committee has given up too. Why not?」

「No, even so, I’m a man…」

「That’s right. I cannot overlook giving Kazunari-san an award meant for women!!」

「Even if you say that… it is a Miss Contest, so that is only natural…」

「Then just make it a Best Couple Award!!!」

Everyone’s gaze shifted at once to that voice coming from somewhere in the crowd.

Best Couple Award?

I would be much more grateful for that than a Miss Contest runner-up, but in the end, it has nothing to do with the Miss Contest.

「If it’s already this messed up, it doesn’t even have to be a Miss Contest anymore, right!?」

「Yeah, yeah!! No problem if it’s not a Miss Contest!!」

「Then it’s no problem if Takanashi-kun wins it!!」

But… those casual remarks created a ripple, and voices of agreement started spreading…

「Wait, wait, wait, wait a second!!! I can’t let that slide!!!」

A figure came rushing out from the wings with heavy thumping footsteps… Unfortunately, it was the Chairman, who seemed to have recovered.

If the Miss Contest award itself were denied here, the identity of the「Miss Contest」Prep Committee would collapse, so it was only natural for him to panic.

「To begin with, the contestants here fought on the stage of a ‘Miss Contest’ to reach the top of all women!! To have someone who didn’t even enter… a boy, no less… mixed into the results is simply out of the question!! What do you think, contestants!? At this rate, all your efforts will be in vain…」

「Um… but I was just here for the memories from the start, and it was fun, so I don’t really have a problem with it?」

「Me too!! I never thought I could beat Satsukawa-san, so the meaning was more in participating than the rank!!」

「Right, right!! At this point, the title of the award changing isn’t a big deal!!」

「Wait!? Everyone!?」

Without even needing to hear the audience’s opinion, the Chairman was turned away by the contestants who were supposed to be his last hope, leaving him literally surrounded by enemies. Plus, the only one likely to agree, the stuck-up woman, was in a total state of resignation, and Sara-san was, of course…

「I have thought from the start that the Miss Contest results did not matter. Now that I have achieved my goal in participating, I have no use for the title of Miss Contest Winner. More importantly… I absolutely will not allow the title of Miss Contest Runner-up to be given to Kazunari-san, a man!!!!」

「Hieee!?」

The second the topic turned to me, Sara-san’s pressure expanded rapidly, completely crushing the Chairman’s momentum.

Calling it a「glare」would be too soft, Sara-san’s gaze pierced him sharply and intensely, leaving the Chairman trembling like a child…

「I guess that’s… checkmate.」

Minamin’s mutter sounded like the true closing declaration…

「ALRIIIGHT!! Well then… we shall hold the ceremony for the Best Couple Grand Prize!!」

Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!

And so…

Miss Contest Winner and Runner-up became the Best Couple Grand Prize…

And we ended up brilliantly winning it… or so the story goes.