Episode 91: The Worst Thing

「Takanashi-san…」

?

I thought I heard my name and turned around. Satsukawa-senpai and Natsumi-senpai were standing there.

「It’s Sara-onee-chan!」

Mio-chan said that happily and squirmed in my arms as I held her, so I quickly put her down.

The moment she was down, she ran and jumped toward Sara-senpai, and Senpai caught her.

「It has been a while, Mio-chan.」

Senpai said that while patting her head, but her expression was clearly and noticeably dark.

Actually, I had never seen Senpai make an expression like that before. I felt a surge of panic and ran over to her.

「Sara-senpai, did something happen?」

「…No… I am fine?」

After looking at my face, Senpai slowly shook her head while saying that.

She didn’t look fine at all. My panic only grew.

「Sara-onee-chan, carry me!」

Of course, there was no way Mio-chan could read the atmosphere. She demanded that Sara-senpai hold her.

I didn’t think Senpai had the emotional leeway to do that right now, but she picked Mio-chan up anyway.

「Mio-chan is a good girl, isn’t she.」

Seeing Sara-senpai with that weak smile as she patted Mio-chan’s head made my chest tighten.

I looked at Natsumi-senpai, and after she looked like she was thinking for a moment, she shook her head.

She either didn’t know, or she had a hunch but couldn’t be sure… something like that.

While that was happening, Todo-san approached.

「Sorry for the suddenness, Satsukawa-senpai. So you were an acquaintance of Mio-chan?」

「……And you are?」

Sara-senpai asked Todo-san in a voice that felt heavy with tension.

Mio-chan seemed to notice Sara-senpai’s mood too, and she stared at her with a puzzled face.

「Ah, nice to meet you. I’m a first year, Todo Marina. I’m Mio-chan’s cousin.」

After Todo-san introduced herself, she bowed toward Sara-senpai and Natsumi-senpai.

「…Nice to meet you, I am Satsukawa Sara.」

「I’m Yuzuki Natsumi.」

The three of them exchanged greetings in a somewhat awkward atmosphere.

「…And your relationship with Takanashi-san is?」

「Oh, we first met when I had him play with Mio-chan before. Today is the second time.」

Todo-san probably felt the awkwardness too, so she explained in a slightly toned-down voice.

「Ah, excuse me, I should probably get going or Mio-chan’s mother might worry. Satsukawa-senpai, thank you very much. Mio-chan, come here.」

「Okay, Sara-onee-chan, bye-bye.」

「Excuse me. Thanks for today, Takanashi-kun.」

I don’t know if it was true, but Todo-san might have sensed the mood. She took Mio-chan and made a quick exit. I’ll have to follow up with her about this later.

More importantly, it’s Sara-senpai.

But Sara-senpai turned to me and bowed.

「Takanashi-san, I shall take my leave as well for today.」

She tried to head home just like that.

Naturally, I thought about stopping her, but Natsumi-senpai gestured for me to leave it to her.

If it were something she could say, Sara-senpai would have told me.

The fact that she didn’t meant she couldn’t, or didn’t want to…

「Sara-senpai, see you tomorrow.」

「Yes, see you tomorrow.」

「See ya, Takanashi-kun.」

「Sara… what’s wrong?」

「Natsumi… am I a hateful woman…」

On the way home, Sara suddenly said that.

I didn’t know how she reached that question, but I could tell she was agonizing over it.

Until now, she had probably been running on nothing but the feeling of being happy, so she’s likely confused by other emotions getting mixed in.

「Hmm. I’ll listen, so just try saying it for now.」

「I… I felt like I hated that person who was next to Takanashi-san. I hated that she and Takanashi-san were doing the same things that Takanashi-san and I do. And I hated seeing Takanashi-san smile at her.」

After saying that much, she made a pained, sad expression.

「Lately, I feel like the number of women calling out to Takanashi-san has increased. Being addressed so familiarly in front of me, and him replying with a smile… seeing that makes it painful and I feel hateful.

But the thing I hate the most is myself for feeling even a little bit of dislike toward the Takanashi-san I love so much.」

Tears welled up in Sara’s eyes.

I see. So you’ve already come this far…

Until now, because there weren’t any girls who were close with Takanashi-kun in the first place, she probably never felt jealousy.

I had seen that the reason she had been checking all sorts of things with Takanashi-kun and getting close enough to touch him lately was because she was feeling anxious.

With jealousy added to that while she still hadn’t fully moved past the anxiety, her heart probably couldn’t process it properly.

But even in that state, she was quite composed when she spoke to Takanashi-kun earlier.

Knowing Sara’s personality, it wouldn’t have been strange for her to put pressure on that Todo girl or try to exclude her. I think she was very good for not doing that.

「I see. I understand how you feel, Sara… That’s a feeling you get when you fall in love, so it’s okay. You don’t have to be afraid.」

I spoke to her slowly and carefully so she would calm down.

「You also did a good job enduring with that Todo girl.」

「…That person is Mio-chan’s cousin. It is only natural that she is an acquaintance of Takanashi-san. To throw these feelings at someone like that…」

It seems she was able to think rationally.

「…That is a lie. It is different. I was scared. I felt like if I did something like that, Takanashi-san would hate me…」

I see… you endured solely out of the desire not to be hated by Takanashi-kun.

Other women appeared around Takanashi-kun, who had been her exclusive domain until now. She felt anxiety for the first time, felt jealousy for the first time, and yet she endured while prioritizing Takanashi-kun.

And seeing that scene today… she’s probably at her limit.

I pulled Sara’s head into a hug and slowly patted her.

「You did your best, Sara… You were able to endure for Takanashi-kun’s sake… You’re a good girl.」

「It is painful… it hurts. Every time I see Takanashi-san getting along with another woman, these hateful feelings overflow, but I know that if I say such things, it will cause trouble for Takanashi-kun. I do not want to be hated by Takanashi-kun for saying such selfish things!」

「Yeah. The feelings you’re experiencing right now aren’t strange. It’s okay. You’ll eventually be able to process those feelings properly. Takanashi-kun will be the one to erase your anxiety. So, just trust him.」

Sara really is cute.

If I were a guy, I’d never let a girl like this go.